a++ would smuggle into space again

From Facebook: nextian has just found a reformation-era How Come? book. "Wherefore is it, that old folkes sneeze with more pain then young?" "How comes it that Eunuches are so extreamly moyst?" "Wherefore is it, that a dog of all other Animals, remaines lynde or fastned within to the female after coupling, without being able easily to unloose, and undoe?"

It's true, you guys. I HAVE. It is the greatest thing I have ever seen. The best part is not the (AMAZING) questions I have posted above, but the questions that I remember from my first How Come book:

Q. FRom whence comes it that pictures to the life seeme to regard us, upon what side soever wee goe?
A. This same proceeds from our mooving, in as much as wee take no regard to that, but only to the picture; neverthelesse perceiving that there is a mooving in one action; wee attribute through errour of the sences, to the aspect of the picture, neither more nor lesse, then doe those which are sayling within a boate, they thinke it is not the boat which goes and remooves, but the shore of the water, the houses, and the trees, which they looke upon.

PS the answers to the first three questions are:

1. Because they have the conduits of their nose more shut, and more straight, and as it were taken and clos'd together.
2. In that their seed which they cannot thrust out, or consume by naturall heat, so well as perfect men, spreads through all their
bodies, and are moyst excessively, by which they have their cheeks blowne up, and their Paps great even as women.
3. Alexander Aphrodeisea saith, the cause is, that the bitch in her native waies is very strait, and the verge of the dog,
being swolne within, by the Ebullition of the spirits, he is hardly able to withdraw it after the coupling.

I seriously have to share this with the world. I'm dropping the enormous index in a comment. Pick a card!

The toxins in scorpion venom are called scyllatoxin and charybdotoxin. Scientists are such dorks.

[Poll #983105]

Pee ess, my mom couldn't answer that question. Just to clarify.

My NaNo novel is going to be called Slicing Light.

I don't know why, except for that I think calling a chemical a "photolyase," or lightcutter, is amazing ingenuity.

(Also, found out today that the full meaning of the name drosphilia melanogaster is "dark-gutted fruit-lovers." I love biological taxonomy. ^^)

Things I Done Learned Good In My First Week of School

1. Wearing a bright pink hat with fake diamonds around the rim gets attention more effectively than almost anything else. It also creates a lasting impression. Unfortunately, wearing said bright pink hat to a meeting with your boss at the synagogue should be avoided at all costs.

2. Five minutes is a perfectly acceptable span of time in which to eat lunch.

3. When your chemistry teacher has you figure out the number of atoms in a pencil dot with no other help but a really sensitive scale, it should be taken as a sign of his intense coolness. Any intimations on his weeksheet along the lines of "Please write all homework on a separate sheet of paper or carve it into a grain of rice" are just confirmations.

4. Similarly, when your genetics teacher actually decides to experiment without certain knowledge of the outcome in front of the classroom and try to extract carrot and banana DNA for you even though it might not be possible, it should be taken as a sign that she is an excellent teacher and should be encouraged. Especially when she forgets the ice, and then the detergent and has to substitute hand soap, and uses meat tenderizer as a protease. Because, damn, that's my kind of teacher.

5. Keeping notes in a notebook in very neat handwriting with a special vocabulary symbol and a table of contents may be entirely alien to one's nature, but in a weird masochistic way, very satisfying.

6. This doesn't prevent one from writing the complete text of "Now is the winter of our discontent" in the margins of the notes on DNA extraction, however.

7. If possible, my friends have gotten more awesome over the summer.

8. On the other hand, I seem to have finally hit adolescence and am yelling at my parents and believing that nobody understands me.

9. When a pretty boy wears one's pink hat of schizophrenia to French class, this is not a sign of metadom. It is just very cool. Really.

10. It is not physically possible to take three music classes at once in the same slot, as much as one may want to. Also, our school does not secretly issue time-turners for this purpose. Hoping for such an option is entirely fruitless. Asking the music teacher will garner only weird stares.

11. The Reconstruction was not the Reformation. They are two very different time periods. Mixing them up will provide strange, strange ideas and should not be attempted. Even if really very funny.

12. Knowing random tidbits about chemistry and history from reading far too much makes your friends think you are much more on top of a class than you are. For example, knowing that H2SO4 is sulfuric acid will be taken as a sign that you understand AP Chemistry. This is a false assumption.

13. Drinking café mocha when on the verge of a panic attack is stupid. Being on the verge of a panic attack on the third day of school is even more stupid.

14. Wanting to be best friends with two fictional characters would probably be more sick if one of the fictional characters was not a direct interpolation of one of your close friends anyway. Also, Lien and Meligot are love.

15. Jaynestown is hilarious, Shindig brilliant and swordfighty, Safe heartbreaking, and Our Mrs. Reynolds endless quantities of lesbian loooooove.

16. Seriously, why couldn't Inara and Saffron have had sex?

17. Dammit.

( Kathy's Song, lyrics. God, I love this song. (c) Paul Simon. )

Links: 13 things that do not make sense, on NewScientist.com.

Oh my god this icon. AH. ketaki, apparently, made it.

Ah, Feynman. Best introductory post yet on deadmentalking.

Pretty, pretty, pretty (strangeweird) picture. Me gusta.

John Keel + Sam Vimes=sexydamnpicture.
Good Omens War=sexydamnpicture all by herself.
Guh. The one on the bottom. NOT a Sirius fangirl, but that's an damn good argument.
(All of these are by the genius dorkorific, the artmastermind behind shoebox_project.)